Looking toward the future

So who isn't afraid of the unknown of the future? There is so much to look forward to; so many, many possibilities. Some things may get better, some may get worse.....some things may even stay the same. I can only hope that the good things always outweigh the bad. I know I have mentioned that I hate wishing my baby's life away, but there are so many things I am just looking forward to enjoying with him; things he will remember too. Big things like trips, first days of school, sports and little things like ice cream in summer, snowmen in winter and everything in between. Every day I am amazed with how fulfilling being a mommy can be.
I am also afraid things will be worse with my arm. I'm not so much worried for my own sake, but I worry that there will be major things I can't do for my little man. I now do things I "shouldn't", but I still can technically do them, so I do, only to pay for them later. What do I do when something hurts so badly I really can't do it? How will my little guy feel? Will he be embarrassed by me? What if it is something that he needs me to do for him?
I know it doesn't do anyone justice to worry about things that are out of our control, but I feel that I have worries above and beyond that of a "normal" parent. What if I need another surgery? How will I take care of my guy? I can barely take care of myself after a surgery.....what ever will I do? I'd be devastated if he came into any kind of harm because I am not at the top of my game. Thankfully I have an amazing family and husband, but even with their help, I don't know how I'd be able to sit back and not do any "mommy" duties......even the very simple things. Even the pain in the rear end things are important to me because without the "unpleasantries", it just isn't really parenting in my mind. It is what I am used to doing as my full-time job, so it'd be like getting fired only to have to sit back and watch as my family filled my old position.